Give thanks to the Lord for He is good

My last post was about trying to be grateful even while disappointed, afraid, and upset. Last night as I was falling asleep (which is a .02 second process lately since I'm preggers...did I mention that here???) I was singing a song in my head. It's not a new song, as there are so many Psalms with this phrasing: "Oh Oh Give thanks to the Lord for He is good". And that's all the song says.

I was struck by its simplicity. Not just lyrically, but conceptually. The concept of gratitude to the Lord is SIMPLE. Basically, we should just always be thankful. Not just because we're being mandated or because the Bible says so and we just have to get over our junk and be grateful because there are starving children in China, so eat the rest of your dinner...that never made sense to me anyway. No, it's not a guilt trip, it's not a discipline. There is a very good reason to be giving thanks to the Lord. He's good! All the time!

There are bumps in all our roads...

- We are so looking forward to meeting this little baby (currently the size of a lemon and already sucking its thumb...so tiny and yet totally formed, it's just maturing now...amazing) but we have lots of reasons to wonder "how are we going to do this?" God is good, so we are giving thanks!

- Joaquim is still searching for a job, and that's really hard. We have days where I am exhausted and he is bored out of his mind because he's been stuck in the apartment. But God is providing in very intentional ways. Joaquim got his first check in the mail from preaching at a church in Forreston, IL this month, and he is currently working on a project to help translate a cell phone system into Portuguese. These connections have been divinely placed in our path, without a doubt. We thank you, Lord!

- We were blessed with a hefty tax refund to pay for half of our trip to Brasil next month (March 25-April 11). We booked those tickets wondering what in the world we were thinking, but we put it in God's hands because we know He is pleased as we pursue our future there. A month later our bank account evened out! We thank you, Lord!

- We have wonderful friends and family, here in the Chicagoland area, around the country, and across the globe.

Even if we had nothing and no one, I pray that we would still give thanks. Because we have been given the greatest gift of all, which is the gift of eternity with our God. This life is such a "poof" and it's not important. Who cares if you get the newest smart phone! Make sure you have GOD. And if you do...give thanks to the Lord, for He is good!

Disappointment...but Gratitude is the Attitude that sets the Altitude for my Life

Feeling really confused about why Joaquim didn't get this most recent really promising job he interviewed for. They emailed him and did a phone interview, then called him for a face-to-face interview all the way in Aurora and then call back a week and 1/2 later saying they chose someone else. My first reaction is "well then why did you call in the first place?" It seemed too good to be true.

Some part of me is telling me it was a learning experience, it was a lesson, and it is continuing to be a lesson in faith...especially for me.

I'm trying to meditate on the lyrics of the song "Gratitude" by Nichole Nordeman. They really capture how I feel about our current situation...dry earth, hot sun and no shade...would you please send a cloud, Lord? And yet it brings home the Choice to be grateful for what we have.

Send some rain, would You send some rain?
'Cause the earth is dry and needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade
Would You send a cloud, thunder long and loud?
Let the sky grow black and send some mercy down
Surely You can see that we are thirsty and afraid
But maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case . . .

We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for You
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If You never send us rain

Daily bread, give us daily bread
Bless our bodies, keep our children fed
Fill our cups, then fill them up again tonight
Wrap us up and warm us through
Tucked away beneath our sturdy roofs
Let us slumber safe from danger's view this time
Or maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case . . .

We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
A lesson learned to hunger after You
That a starry sky offers a better view if no roof is overhead And if we never taste that bread

Oh, the differences that often are between
What we want and what we really need

So grant us peace, Jesus, grant us peace
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between alibis and enemies tonight
Or maybe not, not today
Peace might be another world away
And if that's the case . . .

We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in You
That we are blessed beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need
And if You never grant us peace

But Jesus, would You please . . .

All Will Be Well

Our first married Christmas together was absolutely wonderful!!! Thanks to all for the warm wishes for us. We enjoyed some new traditions for Joaquim and made some of our own. We spent Christmas Eve night and Christmas Day with my family and then the whole family on Christmas Day, which was very nice. Lots of good food (Dad's homemade pizza! and cookies!) and laughter...and of course presents. Joaquim has been enjoying our Wii for a few solid days. And I got maybe too excited about my Cuisinart panini maker/grill/griddle. Mmmm!

One of my favorite parts to the holiday was the Christmas Eve service on Thursday. It was a beautiful evening and the message really touched me.

"Emmanuel: God with us". The whole focus of the evening was how God is present in and involved with our lives. ...or at least that's what I got out of it. At the end, a few people came onstage and shared how God has provided for them or comforted them or cared for them. Then as the band sang, people started popping up throughout the auditorium, holding signs saying "All will be well...God with us". As the music built and hundreds of people stood to their feet with the signs overhead, I was so moved and suddenly it was like God was tapping my shoulder saying "hey, pay attention...this is for YOU. All will be well. I am with you."

That is such a comforting message: All will be well. It will! No matter what circumstances are facing you down right now (and sometimes approaching a whole new year is daunting...) it will all work out. Not because of positive thoughts or karmic justice, but the sole fact that God is with you.

Marching in the tops of the balsam trees

In 2 Samuel 5, David "inquired of the Lord", as he did often, if he should go attach the Philistines and if the Lord would give him a victory. God's response was so awesome, I just had to share it here... He told David that yes, He would go before Him and defeat the Philistines for him, and gave directions as to when David should go out and fight against them. His 'cue' would be when David heard the sound of marching in the tops of the balsam trees.

"As soon as you hear the sound of marching in the tops of the balsam trees, move quickly, because that will mean the LORD has gone out in front of you to strike the Philistine army." 2 Samuel 5:24

Can you imagine? They must have been in a forested area, it could have been hard to know exactly where the other army was, and maybe David's victory depended completely on God because He would have no chance otherwise. So he probably informed his army to just sit tight until they heart marching in the treetops. What would that marching be? God's army marching through above them to fight a battle that was just part of a war still raging today? And you have to wonder if at least a few people thought David was totally nuts...or maybe they all just had great faith in God as their deliverer and defender, because they had seen Him prove Himself to them time after time.

God may not make treetops rustle with the sound of boots barreling through very often these days, but He still does make a way for us. Yesterday I was reading my Bible in the morning and I was feeling apprehensive about what else the future could hold. So I just asked God to remind me of his promised plans for us, before I opened His word. I noticed a highlighted page as I flipped through to find where I'd left off, and took a detour into Isaiah. There I saw Isaiah 45:2. "I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron." I clung to this verse during the spring of 2007, when I was graduating from Taylor and wondering how the heck God was going to do everything I sensed He was telling me He would. I was thinking about visas to Brazil, dating Joaquim (we hadn't started yet...) and then an international wedding (yes I had high hopes even before dating him!) and...you know...there were LOTS of barriers when I looked at things. So God gave me this verse and very clearly told me that yes, there are barriers. But He is bigger and stronger than they are.

Now this verse encouraged me again, because it seems obstacles never cease. There will always be something that I think we won't make it through, or somewhere we will never arrive. Oh, me of little faith! Thank the Lord for reminding me... what just happened this Monday? Joaquim got his green card in record time, we are married, we are exactly where we're supposed to be.

And how did we get here? Well, there must have been some balsam trees rustling somewhere...

Humbled and Awed

I haven't written lately because I just haven't had the time to contemplate, and I quickly tired of talking about food...because I have been too busy to look for new and exciting recipes. That sure happened fast, didn't it?

Well, lots of things are moving quickly! Green cards are supposed to take 6-9 months to process...but Joaquim received his in the mail today after less than 3 months! Are you jaw-dropped-to-the-floor surprised? Yea, we were too! It wasn't really supposed to come until April or so...and here it is! Merry Christmas!

So, what does this mean? Well, it means that God is at work and this is for a reason. It doesn't mean we're hopping on a plane, because we are realizing we have a lot to stabilize here first...and that will take some time. You can be praying for us at this stage - the only next step we currently have is just that Joaquim is looking high and low for a job. Once that gets taken care of we will be able to plan a bit better for the future, but we're not quite there yet.

Our attitude is really one of amazement, as you could guess from the title of this post. We are just blown away by how smoothly this process has gone until now, and don't want to do anything to mess it up! God's hands are just all over this situation and we're taking every step before Him. He has been very clear about closing some doors as far as jobs go for Joaquim, and that has been interesting...it seems as though everything he has been really close to sealing the deal on, just wasn't good enough to the opportunity fizzled for no apparent reason. I guess that is just me being optimistic that it could only have been God saying "just hold on..." We know there is a really good plan here, but we are still in the dark!

Financially, God has been providing our every single need and blessing us here and there with babysitting jobs and things like a $700 dollar discount on getting the catalytic converter replaced on our car. He is so good, but He is just not letting us plan ahead! I've got to admit it's getting a liiiiittle frustrating. :) I know that in our hearts we plan our ways but God directs our steps. We are doing our best to ask for His guidance in every step and He has been faithful to give it. We know He will continue doing that.

Right now, we are praying about when our first trip to Brazil will be, and how that will go logistically. It will be a quick visit...but even those are expensive! Joaquim is looking into some options for classes at Harper, to potentially lead into further education and training to be a pastor...which would obviously be incredible. It feels as though God is just stirring up the waters, and it is AMAZING to think that Joaquim now has nearly every legal right here in the US that I do...all except voting. He can officially own property and he is eligible for any kind of school and would not be considered an "international student" with all the crazy paperwork involved. Recalling our attempts at planning his studies here a year and a half ago, and how many hurdles we faced, it seems nearly too good to be true that none of that would apply right now. This is just so good...what in the world is next? Stay tuned...

Lady Liza

Joaquim and I have made quite a team of ourselves, babysitting. It's been fun and usually we watch two little ones named Liza and Jake. Liza is a little over two years old, and Jake is 7 or 8 months (although he is huge and wears 24 month clothes!) The family is not a Christian family, and that is very apparent just from being in their home. I browsed their bookshelves one day and was just grieved by all the self-help books and explorations of mystic and "spiritual you" sorts of premises. Last Friday, Gus (the dad) was telling us that they went to a pumpkin patch at a local church, and he went out of his way to explain that the ONLY reason they went to the church was for the pumpkin patch. Ok, message received.

So we watch their sweet kids, play games, read books, coax mashed turkey baby food into a laughing mouth and a wobbly head, and it's a great time. The kids love us, and we are quite fond of them. Usually Joaquim takes charge of "baby Jake" (though he still makes me change all the diapers...this will not be true of our future children, but he hasn't realized that yet...) and gets him changed, feeds him his bottle, waits till he falls asleep on his shoulder, and puts him to bed. (Yes, it is super cute.) Liza and I are buddies, and I put her to bed.

This last time, she wanted me to lay down with her a bit (she wasn't super tired, so whatever needed to happen to calm her down, happened!) There we were, I was singing her some songs to go to sleep, and she was starting to close her eyes after a few books read in a calm, quiet voice, and then lights out. So just before I left the room, I said "ok, let's pray."

She looked at me and said, "play?"

And at that moment, my heart broke into a million pieces.

This sweet, blonde, curly haired, skinny, smiley girl who knows all her colors and can sort of count and has memorized the authors name of her favorite book and always likes to flip to the back cover to see her picture...this precious little one doesn't even have the word "PRAY" in her advanced-for-a-two-year-old vocabulary.

So I prayed for her to sleep well, to be safe and healthy, and that she would come to know the Lord someday. And maybe next time we'll talk about Jesus.

Dreams

I was talking with my sister-in-law yesterday about dreams. Not the kind you have when you sleep, but rather those desires you hold dear to your heart and sometimes far from reality. Everyone has an IDEAL life in mind for themselves 15 years out. What's yours?

When I think of mine, I think of people. Lots of people. I won't go into details because...well, that's scary. But I don't think of accomplishments or a job or a house or what kind of car we'll have...I just see faces and I see steaming coffee at a BIG kitchen table (not our 4-person baby table that is currently squeezed into our kitchen.) I see myself in a position to help and counsel lots of young women. I see Joaquim and I saying every day, "I'm not sure we can do this..." but giving, doing, and believing what God has told us.

I guess this thought was born out of reading the Boundless Webzine...(that's a magazine online, fyi. It's done by Focus on the Family and started as a resource for single 20-somethings, but is growing into something that applies to young married couples and young parents. Basically it's ideal insight for my generation.)

http://www.boundless.org/2005/articles/a0001151.cfm - Quarantining a Generation
I've heard a lot about the problem of people my age just dropping out of church. And I do really understand why someone would stop going. It's hard work to get connected in this culture, because we are busy. We don't value each other enough, and we are far too distractable and need too much stimulation to think anything is worthwhile. Whatever happened to talking over coffee and getting to know someone? Those are the best moments. Be curious about someone's life and heart and ask them about themselves. LISTEN. Don't try and compare your life to theirs to have some common ground. That is NOT necessary and in fact can be detrimental to a conversation. Just look them in the eyes, and really listen. Then respond without using the word "I".

Another thought about the youth church culture. Man am I familiar with that. And I'd say 80% of the people I was in youth church with in highschool and college are now nowhere near church. But why? We had a coffee bar and screaming concerts on Friday nights?

"The cry of the emerging church is for relevancy. To keep young adults from slipping out the back never to return, churches believe they must compete with bars, coffee shops and nightclubs.

Jesus didn't try to compete with the culture. He loved people and He spoke the truth, and those were the qualities the masses responded to, not His showmanship. Expecting the church to be relevant to every age group at all times is unrealistic."

Here's the KEY: Love people and speak the truth.